Jimmy Kimmel: Have you thought about circumcision?
Snooki: Oh of course.
Jimmy Kimmel: What are your feelings on that?
Snooki: I definitely want him circumcised. Because then I feel like he won't get laid, if he doesn't.
Jimmy Kimmel: If he's not?
Snooki: I'd be like what is that? So, yeah. I want him to have a normal penis.
Snooki, ladies and gentleman. The voice of our generation. Well, not my generation - but somebody's.
 |
| Hmm. |
I approached the whole circumcision debate the way most of my friends did. Whatever my husband wants. For some reason, the logic behind He has one, he should decide what to do with it made sense to me when I was pregnant. Must have been the hormones making me completely illogical.
I understand there are religious reasons for circumcision. I also understand that there are health issues in some parts of the world. But we didn't have any religious reasons - and we don't reside in sub-Saharan Africa. My husband wasn't concerned about any health implications. The main points he made were, My son should look like me, and I don't want high school girls making fun of him. These points are clearly ridiculous. Let's deconstruct them one by one.
My son should look like me.
Fair enough. What if you were missing a thumb? Would you want him to look like you then? People are different. Their bodies are different. This is something we need to teach our children anyway. I remember the first time I saw a penis. I was about 3 years old, and a friend of the family was changing her son's diaper in front of me. I remember thinking, What the hell? It was then that my mother explained to me that boys and girls have different parts down there. No big whoop. It didn't traumatize me or change my life in any way. Also, I want my penis to look just like my dad's, said no son, ever.
I don't want high school girls making fun of him.
Okay, so I'm supposed to take a scalpel to my newborn son's barely anesthetized penis, because I am concerned about what some silly teenage girl is going to think almost two decades from now? I think not. More and more American parents are foregoing circumcision, so this probably won't be an issue by the time my son becomes sexually active, anyway. Frankly, I don't want him having sex with some ignorant idiot that thinks foreskin makes him un-dateable.
The bottom line is, the It's my husband's choice sentiment flew right out the window after my baby was born. The day after he was born, my midwife came into the hospital room to remind us that we would need to make a choice about the circumcision. I looked at my baby and said, Over my dead body is anyone taking a knife to this perfect specimen. And I meant it. That was my choice. And if you chose different, that's fine too - because we all do what we think is best for our child.
Thanks Snooki, for inadvertantly reminding me that I made the right decision.
Oh my geez. Snooki scares me, and not in a good way.
ReplyDeleteDitto.
DeleteI made the same choice for my son as well. He's 22 now and I don't know if he's had any issues with the situation. (I'm not allowed to ask. lol) The only little problem that I know about was when he was about 2 0r 3 years old and he couldn't keep his grubby little toddler hands off of it. He ended up getting a minor infection, so we had to put antibiotic under the "hood". (That's what he called it) After that we had a little talk about how to wash really good, and that was that. (holy shit he would kill me if he knew I was posting this) Anyway, Snooki is a fucking imbecile, she's already thinking about her unborn son getting laid. To this day, both of my kids are pure. HAHA! I have a 4 year old granddaughter, but I'm pretty sure it was that whole immaculate conception thing.
ReplyDeleteWell, I'm out of things to say and slightly bummed that I can't post a picture of my granddaughter here! LOL
Oh my god, he would be HORRIFIED, wouldn't he? Well, I don't think you have to worry about him reading a mom blog any time soon :)
DeletePreach. My husband didn't even put up a fuss. I couldn't even imagine taking a knife to a newborn for no good reason.
ReplyDeleteI'd rather make a choice that can be undone by him if he chooses, than one he never could.
Agreed. I'm pretty sure my husband is still pissed about it, though.
DeleteI am probably way off base, and don't even ask me why I'm giving Snooki the benefit of the doubt (I don't particularly like her and I've never watched Jersey Shore)...but part of me wonders if she says stuff like that for shock/appearance sake. Like she knows her fans (and maybe people in general) are looking for her to run her mouth and say stupid shit like that, so that's what she's gonna do. She's got her image to maintain. I'm not saying it's the right thing to do and it wouldn't surprise me if I'm totally wrong about it and she is really that shallow (in fact I'm pretty sure she is). But maybe, just maybe, she's really making informed, intelligent parenting decisions. Probably not, but holy christ we can all hope.
ReplyDeleteI'd like to believe that is true, but I highly doubt it.
Deletehahahahah ooooooh snooki. I vetoed my husband's "he should look like me" comment... because, "why?? why should he look like you-- there?" it doesn't make sense (to me) and even with Odey being my second child I could still barely handle the heel prick- I couldn't imagine a dr whom we have to pay over $500 to (I live in Canada) to cut his teeny weeny- while I HOLD HIM DOWN? WTF. No way. I can think of much better ways to spend $500. And to be honest- I asked my friends, with boys around Otis' age-- What did you do?? (after I had made my decision not to- a choice I referred to as Circumcision Decision 2010) Because yea, I want him to be "normal" and not like the "it was like a tiny turtleneck" guy on SATC and the majority were not circumcising.. simply because we, as a society, have realized it's not medically necessary-- Jay is all worried about him being able to clean his penis properly- umm we'll google that shit when it comes time for Otis to shower alone... and plus, my sister was a big of a sl-- umm easy going girl and she's 7 years younger than me-- she said she only saw one circumcised penis. I'm ranting.. bottom line I couldn't hold my baby down to watch him scream while someone cut his private parts up- and also in the future, google will help my child clean his turtleneck.
ReplyDeleteAmy, you are hilarious!
DeleteI remember seeing an uncircumcised penis for the first time. I thought, "Big whoop." Totally not the end of the world, Snooki! I saw no statistical outliers in my high school and college friends...
ReplyDeleteI had a daughter so thankfully we didn't have to elaborate on the whole circumcision decision (hey, that rhymes!). But I did ask my fiance about it and he was on the same side as you. His parents decided to give him the snip. During my pregnancy was the only time it came up in conversation but he made it pretty clear that he feels like part of him is missing. I can completely understand why it's the logical choice to not alter anything about your child's appearance until they're old enough to choose to do so themselves if that's what they want. It bothers me when I see infant girls with their ears pierced, which is just another example. But on the whole "He should look like me debate"- it was actually at my OB's office, when I had to go to a sort of meet and greet appointment, that the office's social worker posed the question: "If you have a boy, do you plan on circumcision?" My answer was that I didn't know, I had talked about it yet with my fiance. SHE was the one that went on to ask me if he was circumcised and when I told her that he was, she responded with "Little boys should look like their father." It made sense to me at the time. I know that no grown man has ever said "I want my penis to look like my dad's", but when you are a small child and you're learning about your body, I do think it can be confusing to a toddler as to why he looks different than his daddy. That's what I thought then, anyway. But I do feel differently now- I feel that it's important to talk to your children openly and honestly about their bodies and how people are different. There are boys and there are girls, and while they have different anatomies, some girls look different than other girls and some boys look different than other boys. It's kind of the same concept of a toddler that knows she's a girl and she knows her mommy is a girl, but mommy has breasts and she doesn't. Mommy (maybe-ha!) has pubic hair and she doesn't. People are different and our differences are what make us lovely and that's a really important lesson to instill in our children.
ReplyDeleteOn another note, and this is just personal opinion, I did have sex with a man who was uncircumcised once and I did not enjoy it. It was weird. You know those weird water balloons that are shaped like tubes and when you hold it in your hand it slides back and forth? Maybe? Well, that's what it reminded me of. But I would never, ever ever ever, think of my child's sex life when making decisions about his body if I ever have a boy. It just... sounds wrong.
And fuck Snooki. She's an idiot, plain and simple.
Right on sister, I wish my mom were as cool as you
ReplyDeleteCheers to all the intelligent and good-hearted ladies who posted here. You all gave a wonderful, storming overturn of the ignorance that spawned this conversation. As 1 side note, to Julie, an intact penis is terrific to manually bring to orgasm, even with no lube. Just saying that in case someday there is the opportunity, try it. You'll both enjoy it! ;)
ReplyDelete