I’m sure by now you’ve seen the Bye Felipe Instagram account, where women post screenshots of interactions they have on dating sites when they don’t return a man’s affections. If you’ve somehow avoided it, I’m sorry for ruining your morning. But did you know, as a woman, you may receive the same kind of ire if you do respond to men online and agree with whatever compliment they’ve thrown your way?
Claire Boniface experienced the same thing the women of Bye Felipe experienced – if she didn’t acknowledge their compliments or messages, she would be criticized for not replying. So what would happen if she did acknowledge them? That’s what she set out to uncover when she started what she calls on her Tumblr page “a social experiment.”
“I’m doing a social experiment called ‘agreeing with boys when they compliment you’.”
Can you guess where this is going? If you answered, “some men do not like it when women accept compliments,” you would be right. Gweneth Bateman got wind of the “social experiment” and decided to share the page with her 67,000+ Twitter followers. She tweets the images from her account @spiritualvodka:
The worst school shooting since Sandy Hook happened three weeks ago – and the news has all but forgotten about it. Apart from the few updates about victims continuing to die, we’ve somehow accepted the narrative that a popular, attractive boy snapped because of some heartbreak or bullying — and the best thing that we can all do is move on and let the families heal.
Everything plays out in the media now. Everything. The radio silence that has occurred since this shooting is sending a rather loud message to our children — and it’s one that we should be very concerned about.
Should we be happy that this shooter wasn’t vilified in the media like every, single other school shooter in our history was? Should we be comforted with the image of one of the only surviving victims smiling with a pop star? Should we be glad his ex-girlfriend — the one he sent a gun selfie to before he shot five of his friends and turned the gun on himself — is so nonplussed about being connected to a killer and this tragedy that she keeps an image of him on her public Facebook page and writes loving messages to him that she knows the world will see?
“We’ve heard a lot from actresses recently about how difficult it is, but we should never be saying that it’s difficult because we are so bloody lucky. It’s just not an OK thing to share. It’s always a juggle, but isn’t it for every working mother?”
Yes, it is. And it’s refreshing for someone with money and resources to basically admit that money and resources makes it easier.
I’m not saying rich and/or famous mothers aren’t going to royally screw up their children just like the rest of us and don’t need to worry. All I’m saying is, don’t be surprised if the rest of us who don’t have those resources want to punch you in the face when you start complaining about how difficult it all is. There is a hierarchy to this. Someone who has it way worse than me is totally entitled to tell me to STFU, too.
I don’t care if you’re Supernanny, you should never discipline other people’s small children. You have no idea what is going on with a child who is behaving poorly. Assuming you do and intervening is ridiculous. When and if you decide to comment on a child’s behavior — address the parent, not the child.
A post I read about a woman’s plane ride from hell begged the question, “Is it ok to discipline another person’s child on a flight?” The author, journalist and novelist Lee Tulloch, recently experienced a horrible flight filled with screaming children. There was one child in particular who was completely out of control. Tulloch claims the child had a seven hour tantrum. From Traveller.com:
The little girl threw a seven-hour long tantrum, interrupted by a blessed hour when, so wound up, she fell into a coma of exhaustion. The parents didn’t seem to be disturbed by this at all. They tried to get her to calm down sporadically, but when she cycled out of control, they put her down in the aisle and let her run wild.
Sometimes she flung herself on the aisle floor, fists balled. Other times she flung herself at her father in his aisle seat, sobbing and begging him to pick her up. The flight attendants didn’t help and just moved her out of the way when they were rolling their carts down the aisle.
I’ve never been on a plane where flight attendants let a toddler roam the aisles by herself. That and the unbelievable seven hour tantrum are sort of making me question how much of this story is based in truth, and how much of it is an overreaction to a child misbehaving in flight. Regardless, disciplining someone else’s tantrumming toddler on a flight will probably not end well.